God before all...

Before everything else in my life, I am a Christian and a Catholic. I don't know how good of a Catholic I am, but that is a lifelong struggle.

If you look at the title of my blog, after God, I am a husband. I have been married only once in my life, 18 years to date to an incredible, wonderful girl. As a result of this marriage, I am the father of seven children. All of them are miracles. The youngest wants to cuddle to sleep with me every night, and the oldest is on his way to getting his learners permit. In between are three daughters and two more son's that are a blessing every day.

I am also a firefighter, and that is where this is going. When the "tones drop" - the alarm goes off - I am a firefighter, first and foremost. In my mind and my heart, it has to be that way. Going back to God, I believe that my being a firefighter is my vocation. It sounds corny, but I guess not too many people do this. I don't understand that - it's not as dangerous as it seems and its incredibly rewarding. It's also tremendously serious - when you dial 911, I am the guy that drives up on the big, red engine. I have been involved in three CPR in progress calls - two of those people did not survive. I can still see their faces.

Where is this all going? There is something going on that bothers me in my department, and maybe in the world. People are, in general, not passionate about being firefighters. Oh, they like wearing the gear and riding on the apparatus, but they don't seem to take the training seriously or the work that goes into being a firefighter. It's a lot of work - no one takes care of our equipment for us. We get taxpayer money for direct expenses, but we have to raise funds for everything else that we do. Training is also a lot of work. It takes time away from the family, it is hard work, and sometimes it can be frustrating - but it is as important as showing up for alarms, if not more so. If you don't have the training to do the job, how can you expect to help someone at an alarm.

I am going to run for Captain next year. That means that I will have to lead my brother firefighters at an alarm, train them to be ready to do their job, and take on more responsibility in the running of the department. In my mind, an officer also needs to be an example to the firefighters. How can I instill in them the same passion for the job that I have? How can I get them to take being a firefighter as seriously and passionately as I do? And how can I do it without seeming corny or like a pompous ass?

I wonder if this is a symptom of a larger problem in the world today. How many people out there are passionate about what they do? How many people out there see that they serve their fellow man? So many people today live life asking the question, "What's in it for me?" Whether it has to do with their choice of college major or deciding to pull over and help a stranger change a flat tire, every decision begins with the question, "What's in it for me?"

There was a time when the world was full of hero's. What is a hero? Someone who does the job, does what is needed without thinking about "What's in it for me?". How do we get back to a time when hero's walked the streets every day?

Some people have called me a hero. I shudder when I hear that. I am not a hero - I am just a normal guy. I have a gift, I think, for doing this kind of work, and I have a responsibility to use the gifts God has given me. Doesn't everyone look at the world this way?